Alaska Bound

A peek under the covers into the journey of a lifetime.

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Location: Anchorage, Alaska, United States

The ulcer is gone. I think I got used to the water. Now I just have to get used to the prices....

Saturday, September 30, 2006

A Sunny Saturday



A birdhouse at Potters Marsh. Yes, that is a license plate for a roof.


This weekend we decided that in order to celebrate that fact that it was not raining, we would get out of the house and do something - anything. We decided that it was time to visit Potters Marsh and do some walking. This would get us prepared for our upcoming diet (uugh..). While there we noticed many species of birds. There were mallards, and well, er, I guess you could say that most of the birds had already flown south for the winter. We did however see at least four salmon. They looked like they did not know that they were already dead. One was actually eating the tail of the other. Either that, or he was hanging on for dear life. Either way they did not look too healthy.




This salmon is not long for this world

On the way out, we discovered where the animals go to take a bath and get clean. I was rather upset that they have a Jacuzzi tub and I do not. Seems that someone is taking care of the animals a little too well. I was wondering however if the tub was big enough for the moose or not.



A Jacuzzi in the woods. This is how the animals stay clean

Since the day was less than half over, we decided to drive to Girwood. It is a town of about 2000 that is about 20-30 minutes outside of Anchorage. It is a gorgeous little town that has some real charm. The people were really friendly, and it had that down home feel to it. I would really not mind living there at all. Dianne had some reservations since it was smaller than her high school. All in all it was a good day. The snow on the mountain tops seems to be creeping closer and closer to us. It will just be a matter of time until I get to experience to joy of driving in the snow.

Thursday, September 28, 2006

Sauce Wonderfull Sauce

Last Monday Dianne we decided that in honor of the coming winter and all the isolation it brings that we should go on diets. At first I was adamantly opposed to this idea. I argued that diets were not healthy and that they only caused weight gain in the long run. She gave me the, “yea, right look, and it was over”. I had once again been defeated by my better half. I asked when this self imposed misery was to begin. She informed me that next Monday we would start our “new” diets. I have no idea why she calls it a “new” diet. We have done this numerous times, and there is nothing new about starving or eating tasteless food. I quickly bolted out the door and headed to Taco Bell. I wasn’t going down without a fight. When I came back, Dianne asked where I had been. I told her that I was saying goodbye to an old friend. She smiled and reminded me that we had just moved here and didn’t have any friends, much less “old” friends. I quickly advised her that I was saying goodbye to Mr. Burrito Supreme, and Mrs. Chicken soft taco. She just rolled her eyes and walked away. I sat down and started making a list of all the things I would need to eat in the next week to make up for the next 3 months of starvation.

About an hour later I was done with my masterpiece. I believe I had at least 27 food items that would need to be made and eaten in the span of one week. Dianne looked at the list and chuckled. I asked her what she was laughing for. She said that there was no way that I could eat all that food in one week. I told her, “ya wanna bet”? Once again she just looked at me and stated, “we have no room in the freezer or refrigerator. Where are you going to put all this stuff”? Again I had forgotten that one vital piece of the puzzle - storage. She told me that I could have one thing on the list, and that was it. We needed to clear out the refrig. I quickly looked at my list pondering what it was going to be. Would I choose a large pizza with Skittles? Perhaps it would be deep fried biscuits stuffed with peanut butter on top of a bed of cheese grits. Oh, my mind raced to figure out this problem. Suddenly it hit me. It would have to be sauce. Yes, sauce, but not just any sauce - My Sauce. This is a sauce that causes neighbors to knock on your door asking to borrow a cup at 10:30 at night. The only problem with this sauce is that it takes 2-3 days to make. It cooks slowly in a crock pot on low for most of the time until it is united with its eventual partner. All the while the ingredients slowly reducing, melding and mixing into a harmony of flavors.

There is one problem though. What to put the great and wonderful sauce on, in, or around? The possibilities were endless. It could be any one of a thousand choices. I asked Dianne and she suggested several very good ones, but nothing that would stay with me for those long lonely 3 months. Then it hit me. I would make Manicotti. It was the perfect balance between fancy and just plain. Normally I would choose to make a nice seven layer lasagna, but due to time constraints and very little room in the refrig, I was motivated to go with manicotti. It is the perfect balance between an elegant 5 star dinner, and a drive through meal at Wendy’s.

The sauce is done, and I am hoping that Dianne gets home soon before it is all “tasted away”. Tonight the sauce will be atop luscious manicotti noodles filled with some of the most decadent ricotta and mozzarella filling known to mankind. It will be baked to perfection, and topped with a secret blend of cheeses that even now makes my knees weak thinking about. The greatness can, and will only last until sundown on the first of October, for the next day will be Monday. I will remember it as “Black Monday”. The day the manicotti was not to be eaten again.

Thursday, September 21, 2006

Dog-Gone-Winter

As winter is fast approaching I am scrambling to get all the items that will be necessary for a long and cold winter. Things like studded tires, snow shoes, clothes, and beer. You know, just the bare essentials. I am trying to put everything off as long as possible (except the beer…) in hops that the prices will drop at the last minute. Dianne calls this procrastinating. I like to think of it as bargain hunting. In any case, I really don’t think I have much more time left. I believe there was more snow on the mountain tops today, and from what everyone tells me, it is not getting any warmer. Since I have not been here a full year, I can’t say for sure, but I have heard that the snow actually comes down off the mountain, and makes its home in the Anchorage area for a while (some even say that it covers the entire state, but that is just crazy talk…). If this is in fact the case, I may need to get some warmer clothing. My current wardrobe is the one that I used to cut grass in Florida in. It was usually 95+ degrees when I would cut grass, so you could say that my wardrobe is for a slightly warmer climate.

I did however go to the Sportmans Warehouse to find a pair of winter boots/shoes/footwear. What I found was amazing. In Florida my choices were either running, or walking. Not too difficult of a decision. I thought I was familiar with shoes. That is until I entered into the realm of the winter footwear. I believe there were 400+ types of shoes on display. I looked around, got dizzy, and left. If this was the gun section, I would have just stared and drooled for hours, but since they were shoes I decided that I had no idea of what I was looking at and left. I came home later that day and told Dianne of my discovery. She laughed at me and made little snickering noises. Apparently she seems to have more knowledge in the footwear arena than I. Being that she is a woman, and therefore should like shoes, I did not challenge her authority. It does seem strange that she had knowledge of winter snow shoes though.

I advised Dianne that I will be looking for a pair of winter boots that are ankle height and studded. I have no idea if they make shoes with studs in them, but if they make them for tires, why not for shoes. I figure that if I can’t find any studded shoes, I can always drill some holes in my shoes and bring them into a tire store to be re-studded, or in this case, just studded. Now that I think about it, I wonder if a shoe repair shop might offer that service. Who knows, I will have to check into that.



The dog is more prepared for winter than I am.

Dianne decided that the dog was getting cold, so she went to the local Petco and bought him a parka and dog booties. Yes, they actually make booties for dogs. I swore that I would never dress my dog up in clothes. So far, I have not dressed him up in anything - Dianne does that for me. Now not only will he be wearing a parka, but he also has little booties. All this got me thinking. As I was staring at the dog laughing uncontrollably, I realized something. The dog is now better equipped to handle the winter than I am. If winter were to hit full force tomorrow I would have to walk a nice warm dog in shorts and a tee shirt in 3 feet of snow. He would be nice and warm, and I would be frozen. If all else fails I could always try to fit into his little parka. I think the booties are a little too small for me though.

Wednesday, September 13, 2006

Tails, Tags, and Plates

This is how I plug in my electric car. I think the thing to the right is an Alaskan mosquito.


So now it’s official. We have a tail, tags, and plates. I guess this means that we are ready to get a ticket in winter. Ok, ok, let me explain. First the tail. Last week I took the car in to get a block heater installed. This is a little device that plugs into your engine block and keeps your cars engine warm in the winter. It also does other nifty things like keep you radiator fluid in a liquid state, and not a solid. But the really cool part about it is that you have to plug your car into the wall for the whole thing to work. So sticking out of the front of most of the vehicles in Alaska you will find a little cord. I prefer to call it a tail. Of course a tail is usually on the back of a vehicle, but who cares, this is my fantasy and I will live it just the way I want to.

Being that I will now have to plug my car into the wall at night in the winter, I am going to make the assumption that I now have an electric car, or at least at night when I plug it in. This being the case, I am thinking very strongly about taking a tax credit for having a hybrid/electric car next tax session. I figure my car is running because it is using electricity right? Anything for a tax break. (Side note: If the IRS is reading this, it is just a joke - I always pay all my taxes, and never cheat - not even a little…).

The tags part. Ah, yes. You see, in the Anchorage area they are concerned about the quality of air we breath, or lack there of. Think Los Angles and you will get the picture. So every car that is older than 3 days, 5 hours, and 7 minutes must get an emissions test. This is not the part that I am concerned about. The part that upset me was the paying the 80 some dollars to be told that my car was well within the limits. For this I received a nifty little sticker that goes on the lower left side of the windshield and says that my car is a good (non-polluting) vehicle for 2 more years.

And finally the plates. So today I went back to the DMV to get my Alaska title, registration and tags. All I had to do was to bring proof of passing the emissions test, clean Florida title and registration, proof of insurance, a filled out form that resembled the 1040 long form, oh, and about $133. You also had to bring much patiences. The wait at the DMV was about 45 minutes. My number was 198. When I sat down they were calling 162. I eventually was called. I explained what I needed done, and after about 20 minutes I to had Alaskan plates. I quickly drove home and bolted them on. There shininess was a stark contrast against the dirt colored green of the van. I just can’t wait to get them so filthy that they will be impossible to read. I give it about a week, or the first rain.

Now I am prepared for winter (yea, right…) and have tags. All that is left to do is go shopping for a new set of studded tires. I am looking for the longest, meanest, biggest studs out there. I want this van to look like something out of a Mad Max movie. I just can’t wait for people to look over and see the “dirt green” beast. Children will cry, women will run, the wife will say, “what the hell were you thinking?” I will have a minivan that will be able to drive on ice, up hills, and over moose.

Friday, September 08, 2006

Floridian in Paradise

The view of an oncomming train in Whittier.


For the past week Diannes mother has been up to visit and buy most of Alaska. I believe at one point she attempted to purchase a train, but at 43 tons each they would be a bit difficult to get on the plane. She is a confirmed shop-a-holic and has no problems admitting it. We put her up in a hotel that was next to downtown so that she could buy shop downtown whenever she wanted. As it turned out, she had to buy 3 extra suit cases just to get all the extra booty home. The woman is obsessive.

Being her first time to Alaska, and the fact that we have been here sooooo long, we were obliged to show her the sights. This meant that we did all the touristy thing like going to flat top, driving to Whittier, seeing a moose, telling the mother-in-law that she had to walk on the mud flats until she got stuck…. Ok, perhaps not the mud flats thing.

This is what 90,543,084,243 ice cubes look like

All in all it was a wonderful visit by a wonderful mother-in-law (I still want that new truck, and think about all the stuff you could fit in the bed if you bought one for us - I love you). Unfortunately the trip ended before she was able to buy us a new vehicle. That is ok because there will be other visits, and I would really prefer an 07’ model anyway…

So in the past week I have seen more mountains, glaciers, eagles and waterfalls than I have seen in…..Oh, about 2 weeks. This place really is amazing.